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Dead Kennedy (Part 2)

Tomorrow, a perfect storm of events will descend upon Boston. There’s a large Italian festival in the North End. The Red Sox are in town. Britney Spears is in town. Thousands of college students are converging upon the city along with their parents and all of their stuff. Tropical Storm Danny is expected to drop buckets of rain. And, there’s Ted Kennedy’s invitation-only funeral, which will be attended by virtually every elected official in the English-speaking world, including all five living Presidents.

Since my invitation to Ted’s funeral hasn’t yet arrived (ahem), I decided to go to the JFK Library today, to view Ted Kennedy’s flag-draped casket along with the thousands of other commoners. Because it has been my honor to have Ted Kennedy represent me in Washington. He was one of those rare politicians that actually did good things.

Viewing hours today were from 8am to 3pm, so I resolved to go early via the subway. I arrived at 8:30am to find a long but not overwhelming line. A line handler told us that it may take up to an hour to reach the library entrance. In fact, it was 75 minutes (still a bargain compared to the line that latecomers would face).

Line of mourners outside JFK Library, UMass Boston

Line of mourners outside JFK Library, UMass Boston

I brought a newspaper to read. Other people talked and played on their phones. The constant stream of airplanes ascending into the sky from Logan Airport provided entertainment for all.

Members of the Kennedy family stood alongside the line to shake our hands. I shook hands with 4 gracious though minor Kennedys! All murmured “Thank you so much for coming,” and looked me straight in the eye with baleful solemness as they pressed my hand. “I’m so sorry for your loss,” I said. The only name I got was Kym Smith, who is Jean Kennedy’s adopted daughter from Vietnam and who has some startling ankle tattooes.

Black-clad Kennedys Greeting Mourners

Kennedys Greeting Mourners (left and right)

Kennedys Greeting Mourners

Kennedys Greeting Mourners

And of course, the media was everywhere.

Media outside of JFK Library

Media outside of JFK Library

It was exciting to finally reach the entrance.

Near entrance of JFK Library

Inside entrance of JFK Library

We filtered into a hallway towards the room where Ted Kennedy’s body lay in repose. A man informed us that no photographs were allowed in the room, so I took one last picture and tucked my camera away.

Nearing the casket

Nearing the casket

It’s hard to find words to describe how it felt to file past Ted Kennedy’s casket for that brief 90 seconds. Awe. Respect. Sadness. The Honor Guard stood to absolute attention, as immobile as wax. The room was absolutely silent despite the presense of a dozen media folks. Among the seated mourners, I looked for the widow Vicky Kennedy, but I didn’t see her.

Then, my slow walk past Kennedy’s casket was complete, and I was out of the room, and back outside in the cool sunshine of Friday morning.

Posted in Massachusetts, migrated.

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Dead Kennedy (Part 1)

Senator Ted Kennedy’s funeral procession passed in front of my office today at 4:30pm. We were waiting for it. I broke from my co-workers in order to stand on the Fort Point channel bridge and attempt to snap a picture of Kennedy’s hearse with my pitiful camera phone:

Kennedy's Funeral Procession

FAIL. Obviously, I took the picture too soon to get the hearse in the center of the frame, and since my camera phone is, like, two years old, I can’t automatically “reload” the camera. So I abandoned the camera and started clapping.

To my surprise, the cars that followed the hearse were filled with black-clad Kennedys. Smiling, waving, good-looking Kennedys. Scores of them.

“There’s Joe!” a man next to me called. “Hey Joe, you’re next!”

I turned and stared at the man, who meekly added, “You’re next for the job, I mean.”

A co-worker who had a real camera graciously provided me with a nicer picture:

image001

Posted in migrated, The 9 to 5.

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New Favorite Word: Vainglorious

Last night I started reading A Season of Splendor: The Court of Mrs. Astor in Gilded Age New York and the title of Chapter 2 totally tickled me: The Vainglorious Vanderbilts. Huh! There’s an adjective I have to start using more, I thought.

And then today I was reading a tribute to Ted Kennedy on Huff Post and the author, when speculating about how history would have changed had Ted Kennedy won the presidency in 1972, said that we would have been spared “the ridiculous rise of vainglorious Chevy Chase.”

To come across a word as unfashionable as “vainglorious” twice in 24 hours means that I have no choice but to anoint it as  my new favorite word. Obviously there is a vainglorious revival underway. Be prepared.

vainglory (noun): boastful vanity

vainglorious (adjective): filled with, characterized by, given to, proceeding from, or showing vainglory.

vaingloriously (adverb): with empty pride

Posted in In the News.

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Ted is Dead

I was saddened this morning when I heard that Ted Kennedy passed away (here). The US Senate suddenly seems about as ‘in control’ as an unanchored boat pitching and careening through a heaving, stormy sea. Truly America will miss Ted Kennedy, the ‘Lion of the Senate.’

(That’s just a metaphor, by the way. He wasn’t really a lion. As far as we know.)

Posted in In the News.

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Butt Bites

Tonight, after two months of watering, pruning, and salivating… we ate the first tomatoes from our garden! You’ll notice that this year, they are both red AND juicy.

Tomato, Cucumber, Red Onion Salad

Tomato, Cucumber, Red Onion Salad

Yes, we took a bite out of the garden… and the garden bit back.

When I was in the garden selecting which red n’ juicies were ready to be consumed, I got attacked by one of the virulent mosquitos which originates (I suspect) from a neighbor’s standalone garage bordering the garden. Specifically, it bit my butt 4 times, somehow penetrating the fabric of my skirt to leave huge-ass itchy welts all over my left one.

I’m only including a photo because it’s sufficiently blurry and because I’ve lost another 4 pounds.

Butt Bites

Butt Bites

Posted in Existence.

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Sunday Dawn at Zealand Falls Hut

On Sunday morning, I awoke at 5:30 am to the sound of a crinkling wrapper. I’m not a light sleeper — I can filter out rattling air conditioners, steamy radiators, and my husband’s sonorous snoring —  yet this exotic noise piqued my slumbering mind. It sounds like… cellophane on an energy bar? Better wake up and investigate.

It turned out the man in the adjacent bunk — the snorting snorer who woke me up at 2am when he struggled to climb down from his top bunk to go to the bathroom and then again at 3:30am when he turned on his headlamp to read, flooding my face with light — had decided he wanted a little predawn snack. And why not! He had a very active night!

Giving up on sleep, I pulled on my socks and padded gently out to the hut’s main room. It was 6am, and the official wake-up wasn’t until 6:30am. The hut crew was already setting up for the 7am breakfast, and I grabbed an herbal tea to keep me company as I contemplated the view from the front porch.

Through the valley, a stream of morning mist floated by as delicate as finely-steamed milk on a proper cappuccino. Occasionally a break in the translucent flow would allow a glimpse of the tall conifers of the neighboring mountain, peaking out through the froth clinging to its boughs. And higher in the sky, the more resolute clouds shifted to reveal patches of soft blue sky that would be concealed the next time you looked.

The sky continued to change as the hut began to hum with the activity of 36 awakening guests. Soon an opaque cloud cover descended, casting a doomy gloom on the morning. But… in the distance, a spot of brilliant sun had opened up, and I ran to get Mr. P’s camera to capture it. When I returned, the porch had been transformed into a seething tourist attraction. One father with his 2 young sons (all clad in identical black Under Armor) was in awe of the intense bit of sun piercing the gray sky, and he proclaimed, “It’s just like Noah’s dove!”

I snapped several pictures, but none of them could live up to the real thing. How could it?

Ray of Light

Ray of Light

Posted in Existence.

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Mounts Zealand, Bond, and Hale (Aug 22-23 2009)

Last month, as we strategized how we would finish hiking our remaining White Mountain 4000 Footers before snowfall, we came to the conclusion that an overnight stay would be necessary in order to bag the Bonds along with nearby Mount Zealand and Mount Hale. We could either camp at a wilderness campsite, or…

“Can we stay at the Zealand Falls Hut? Please can we stay at the hut?” I begged Mr. Pinault. I kinda like the idea of staying at the huts because they remind me of summer camp, what with the communal meals, the bunk rooms, and the zany college-aged hut crew. Mr. Pinault knew full well that neither of us, in fact, actually enjoy the hut experience, but he made the reservation and paid the $100/person per night (!!!) rate in advance, so we had no choice but to head to the White Mountains this weekend despite a dismally rainy forecast.

Zealand Falls Hut is probably the most accessible of the 8 AMC huts, and therefore is a popular destination for families, especially (it appears) father-son hiking trips when the father isn’t rugged enough to haul food, supplies, and bedding on his back in order to provide for a real camping experience for his son. Young families also like the huts, as do retirees. There was once a time when the huts were filled with AT thru-hikers and college students, but they’ve been priced out of the huts and into the woods.

We reached the hut at 10:30am on Saturday morning to claim our bunks, drop off our stuff, and consolidate our rain gear and food into one pack before hitting the trail to Mount Zealand and ultimately the Bonds. No major rain, just drizzle and low-hanging clouds.

At Zealand Falls Hut

At Zealand Falls Hut

Mount Zealand was a heckuva climb, and it was disgustingly humid although not hot. We climbed for about an hour before hitting a spectacular viewpoint. The clouds swirled awesomely through Crawford Notch:

Viewpoint from Mount Zealand

Viewpoint from Mount Zealand

We reached the summit of Mount Zealand about 30 minutes later. It was modest and wooded, although there was a pretty sign.

Summit of Mount Zealand

Summit of Mount Zealand

Then the real fun began. We headed to the lovely alpine zone of Mount Guyot (not an official 4000 Footer) en route to the Bonds.

Mount Guyot

Mount Guyot

We were under a bit of time pressure. It was unlikely that we’d bag both of our remaining Bonds (Bond and Bondcliff) and make it back to dinner at the hut, which begins promptly at 6pm. (Not to point fingers, but had we gotten up at 4:30am that morning like I wanted to, it would have been feasible.) In any event, we decided to go to Bond only, and save Bondcliff for our very last 4000 Footer, because the Bonds are amazing.

Bondcliff

Bondcliff

Yes, due to their remoteness and 360-degree views, the Bonds are amazing, and because the weather forecast was so dreadful we had them all to ourselves on a Saturday in the summer. And the rain never even happened.

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Bond. Mount Bond.

After bagging Bond, we rushed back the 7 miles to the hut… which we reached at ten minutes to 6pm in near-delirium. The hut dinner was typically hardy, starting with bean soup and bread, which ironically, I could not eat despite having just hiked for 8 hours while everyone else who barely broke a sweat on their leisurely jaunt to the hut dug in with gusto. I got a few strange looks when I loaded my plate with nothing but turkey and salad.

After dinner, we played communal card games before wandering to our bunks and collapsing. I was awoken 3 times over the course of the night by the same man. The first time, he got up to use the bathroom. Okay, I’ll excuse that. The second time, he turned on his headlamp to read… at 3:30am!?! The third time, he was unwrapping some sort of granola bar… at 5:30am?!?

No time for sleep-depraved delirium, we still had Mount Hale to hike. After breakfast, we started the 2.8 mile climb to Mount Hale in a thick mountain mist. Mount Hale affords no real views anyway, although there is a super-large cairn where a fire watchtower used to sit.

Mount Hale. Hale, yeah!

Summit of Mount Hale. Hale, yeah!

After bagging Hale, we walked another hour back to the car, pleased that we “beat” the weather forecast and stayed relatively dry while enjoying one of the most scenic areas of New Hampshire…

From Mount Zealand

From Mount Bond

On Mount Bond

On Mount Bond

Posted in 4000 Footers.

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Smack Attack

Researchers have found a safe, effective treatment for heroin addiction. And that treatment is… heroin (here).

For years, methadone was dispensed to heroin addicts tocurb their withdrawal symptoms while keeping them from attaining the same debilitating opiodid euphoria. The problem with methadone, according to scientists, is that “many patients don’t want to take it; they just don’t like it.”

So, if the heroin addicts don’t like methadone, what do they like? Turns out, they like heroin.

In a study that compared the treatment of heroin addicts with methadone versus the treatment of heroin addicts with daily injections of heroin, after a year, 88 percent of the heroin-users were still in the study and two-thirds of them had significantly curtailed their illicit activities, including the use of street drugs.

No doubt the *free daily shots of heroin* probably helped make the heroin treatment a success.

In all seriousness, I applaud the implications of this study: That, if we treat heroin addicts like people with a medical problem by prescribing them heroin in a controlled situation rather than like criminals who have no choice but to satisfy their addiction on the mean streets, they’ll be less likely to overdose, share needles, sell drugs, or rob me.

But also in all seriousness… what is the practical application of the study results? Are the researchers actually proposing that heroin become a prescription drug? This begs the obvious, groan-inducing question: What are they smoking?

Posted in In the News.

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Frankly, Frank Doesn’t Give a Damn

Massachusetts Representative Barney Frank is receiving national attention for his combative town hall meeting yesterday, during which he didn’t take the abuse of his mouth-foaming nutjob constituents like a houseplant, but rather jabbed back with his trademark rapier wit:

“Trying to have a conversation with you would be like trying to argue with a dining room table,” he told a woman who compared Obama’s health care reform to the policies of Nazi Germany. “I have no interest in doing it” (here).

(That’s the straightest talk I’ve heard from a politician in a long time, and it’s coming from a gay man.)

One of my favorite stories about Frank come from this in-depth New Yorker profile here:

Paul Begala, the political strategist, was speaking at a fund-raiser for a gay-rights group and said, “When I told my father, back in Texas, that I was speaking to an L.G.B.T. group, he said that sounded like a sandwich.” From the audience, Frank called out, “Sometimes it is!”

I used to joke that I moved to Massachusetts just so I could vote for Ted Kennedy. Perhaps I’ll move to Newton to vote for Barney Frank.

Posted in In the News, Massachusetts.

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Sweaters Sweating Sweat

The heat is on. On the street. Inside your head. On every beat. And the beat’s so loud. Deep inside. The pressure’s high. Just to stay alive. ‘Cause the heat is on.

I dug up the lyrics to the preceding Glenn Frey ’80s classic for two reasons. #1: to pay homage to the first heatwave of the Summer of 2009 for not rearing its hot little head until late August. #2: to attempt to get a new song stuck in my head to replace Joni Mitchell’s “The Circle Game,” which became lodged in my consciousness last Saturday as I pondered strappy copper glitter patent leather spiked heels in the Marc Jacob’s store in Provincetown. “And the seasons, they go round and round, and the painted ponies go up and down.” EEEUUUGGHH. Please, someone, put me out of my misery. Lobotomize me.

As Labor Day looms, Bostonians are finally getting the summer that they professed they wanted back in 60-degree rainy June. Are you happy now that it’s 95 degrees with oppressive humidity, you cold-blooded whiners? Are you happy now? No, I look around and I don’t see one happy-looking Bostonian strutting around. I see a beaten, sweaty lot, walking slowly on the sun-blasted concrete and carrying their backpacks on one shoulder so not to incur back-wide sweat stains.

You’re dreaming of fall, aren’t you? The crisp 50 degree afternoons, replete with chilly breezes that make you want to go home, eat soup, and cuddle with your loved ones. And if you get too cold, you can just put on another layer. You see, that strategy doesn’t work when it gets hot, because pretty soon you’ll run out of layers that you can legally shed, and you’re still hot. So obviously… cool weather RULZ.

and the painted ponies go up and down.” For the LOVE of GOD someone get this song out of my head. I pleaded my case to a co-worker, who suggested that I attempt to replace the demonic Joni Mitchell lyrics by listening to Pearl Jam.

“Pearl Jam? Are you mad?” I demanded. “Nobody gets Pearl Jam stuck in their head because half of what comes our of Eddie Vedder’s mouth is a moan and the other half’s a wail.”

“How can anyone hear ‘don’t call me daugh-ter‘ without getting a mental loop of that lyric? Oh great, now I got it. ‘Don’t call me daugh-ter,” he sings.

And the painted ponies go up and down,” I sing.

Of course, life in the air-conditioned office isn’t affected by the heatwave, it’s life in our humidity-trapping wooden double-decker house that’s become literally hellish. I sleep with a window air conditioner rattling 12 feet from my head, which does not entirely prevent sleep but keeps me constantly on the cusp of waking, which is provoking a myriad number of vivid dreams with startling conclusions. Like last night, when I dreamed AS and I were roaming my hometown and we encountered a trove of cute punk boys living in the woods and we went with them to get ice cream (which I wouldn’t eat, not even in my dreams). So far, a near-perfect dream… but then they started raping other girls outside of the ice cream shop. “What do we do?!” AS asked as we watched. I awoke, disturbed but pleasantly chilled by the laboring air-conditioned window unit.

Yes, the heat is on. On the street. Across the state. Across the entire Northeast. Inside my house. And inside my head. The heat is … on.

Posted in Existence.

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