Sexy pants: the tight-fitting, spandexesque leggings that are worn by nordic skiers who desire speed. Sexy pants are not to be confused with sex pants, which are noises similar to the noises made by those wearing sexy pants while skiing uphill.
I had resisted XC skiing in sexy pants until I honed the skills to back up the inherent statement of ability that sexy pants make. Flailing novices don’t attract too much attention on the trails, but a skier in sexy pants better stay upright, lest they become an object of mockery among the plodding lifelong nordic skiers who wear blue jeans with handmade gaiters.
My previous XC ski pants were baggy, and gave no hint of the shapely figure contained within. As you can imagine, Mr. Pinault was keen on getting me into a pair of sexy pants and out of the Grandma pants (terminology culled from underwear distinctions). While in France, we stopped at a ski shop, where I picked out these Quechua pants. Sporting goods never felt so naughty.
Sexy pants are not all about looks, of course. Tight pants offer lightweight warmth and elicit better response from one’s muscles, improving speed, technique, and comfort. This past weekend, at Great Glen Trails at the base of Mount Washington in New Hampshire (here), my performance was amazing. I was so fast that Mr. Pinault, who is usually far ahead of me, was perpetually lingering behind me. It could have only been the sexy pants (wink wink).
(Pictured below is Mr. Pinault, tubing at Great Glen Trails in his sexy pants).
